| The discount store. These come in many forms depending on where you are in the world, but you can be sure of one thing. In every single discount store, at any time of the day, you will find families shopping. Why? Because if you have exhusted all your other resources and actually have to spend your hard earned cash on food, this is the place to do it. There are a few things to be aware of in these establishments though. First, the food quality is usually among the worst you can ingest in the nation. That's why it's discounted! No need to worry though, you can always get the equivalent of Pepto Bismal off the shelf while doing your shopping. Next, you might consider wearing some sort of portable music device while in the store to drown out the noise of all the children that will undoubtably be there with their mothers. Now, don't get me wrong here, I love children, but these will be no ordinary children! These will be the kind of kids that are totally uncontrolled by their parents. Screaming, snot-laden, dirty kids running full tilt down the isle while their mother screams obscenitys and threatens physical violence. Of course they don't listen. Partly because they don't want to, partly because they can't hear their mothers commands due to the fact that her voice is muffled by what seems to be a bale of hay in her throat, but it's actually a thick film of tar covering her vocal cords from years of chain smoking. Most likely while her kids are in the car with the windows rolled up! |
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Don't get discouraged! All in all, the discount store is a good idea. You can get everything from food to birthday gifts, even condoms; although I don't recommend them. Probably not too safe. So, if you have to resort to shopping at one of these places, I can only wish you good luck. |
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